Pride

Well, it goeth before a fall, they saith.

And there are those absolutely cryptic bumper stickers that came out right after we invaded Iraq (but not for their oil, of course, and who's this we, Paleface?). The Power of Pride, the stickers said. Huh? Well, it had red and white stripes, by god, so you know it's got to be good ... er, right.

There are the pride parades, too, giving our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters a forum for speaking out and coming out, and for offending the righteous right even more than usual.

Okay. Fine. Whatever. I'm tired and I'm distracted by getting ready for Circus McGurkis. But did you hear the presidential debate last night? I didn't mean to. As most of you know, I eschew The Media, and if that makes me a glum and boring dinner partner, so be it. There's always Key Lime Pie. I was innocently driving home in my car when I carelessly turned on the radio, thinking to get some classical or jazz. Instead, I got incensed.

I heard McCain talking about how proud he was of Palin. He said it half a dozen times. "I'm so proud of her for ..."

Really, now, can you hear Obama saying, "I'm so proud of Joe for his stance on Iraq"? Of course not. He's not an idiot.

Being proud of someone usually involves a hierarchy. A father is proud of his daughter. When he's proud of his wife, who should be a peer, it's a little patronizing, but at least there's usually some affection. I don't doubt McCain has affection for Palin (which further proves he'd be an unfit president), but he shouldn't be patting The Little Woman on the head and being proud of her.

I wonder if you other recovering alcoholics feel the same way about this. Don't you just hate it when someone who has nothing to do with your sobriety -- a shrink, an aunt, a co-worker -- says, "I'm so proud of you!" Who asked ya'?

McCain was just being sexist and doesn't even know it and so he needs to be slapped. I've actually wondered if it's the Democrats who somehow managed to get Palin to run with McCain. Hey. It could be a movie! Runs with Wolves.

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In the meantime, Circus McGurkis (http://www.circusmcgurkis.org/) is Saturday at Lake Vista Park from ten to four. It's a project of the Religious Society of Friends, the Quakers. No, Mike. They don't make the oatmeal. If you want to float in a sea of Obama supporters, you'll love Circus. If not, you still have the tie-dye, the drum circles, the atheists, the nudists. I always like the Florida Association of Midwives. I went to a special meeting of theirs years ago because Alice Walker was the guest speaker. Wow, huh? In fact, here I am, gushing at her and there she is, wishing she were back in her hotel room. She's the first writer I ever wrote a fan letter to and the first one who wrote back. I believe I just dangled a preposition, but if that's all I'm dangling, I count myself lucky.


For you locals, then, I'll see you Saturday. For my nephew in New York and my cousin in Kentucky, you'd better leave now.

If you haven't done it yet, sing The Name Song using Obama for the name. It's perky. It's fun. It'll cheer you up. Everybody now! 'Bama, 'Bama, Obama, bonana fana fo fama, fee fi mo Mama -- 'Bama!

Now just the girls!